Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Randomize
