i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
