that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
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