you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
