Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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