quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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