He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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