The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
love makes seman taste better
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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