Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Randomize
