Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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