if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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