Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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