so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Still dying that you shit outside
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
