It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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