The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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