i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
