no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize