weddingsv make me drug and hornr
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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