I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
