My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
