I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
My ATM looks so different sober.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
