I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Found your dick twin last night
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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