i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize