question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
