I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Randomize
