i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
