Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
