I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Randomize
