You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
