yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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