If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
