if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
