he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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