so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
