I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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