I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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