I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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