I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
don't judge my taste in strippers
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Randomize