hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
he shaved USA in his pubs
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
