everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
