why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Randomize