I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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