New low: just hacked my moms facebook
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Randomize