First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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