Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
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