There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize