I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
