youre lurking in front of me
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
