You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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