He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
